Friday, March 31, 2006

One post, two days

I don't know what happened yesterday, I was just too busy to write! I have a new job (same team, different responsibilities) and work is super-busy. On the other hand, I'm super-engaged and excited by the work, so I guess it's a good thing. But it's going to get really hard to balance family, work, and training. We'll see how things go, though.

The back of my knee still hurts, but I was able to run yesterday and I was able to fully participate in indoor cycling today - and Danielle made the class HARD.

So yesterday: let's see, I remember generally what I ate and exercised:

Thursday's Data

Pre-workout: Larabar, 130 cals
Breakfast: Yogurt and granola, ham and cheese, cream in coffee
Snack: string cheese (I think I ate this)
Lunch: Chicken taco salad
Snack: Candy, I was bad
Dinner: Pizza, I was really bad
Dessert: 3 little strawberry cookies, one chocolate chip cookie, and milk

Run 90 minutes, 650 cals
Circuit training, including 15 more min running: 500 cals
Total calories burned: 1150

Today's Data

Pre-workout: Banana, milk in coffee: 100 cals
Breakfast: Cottage cheese, strawberries, two hard-boiled eggs, string cheese, milk in coffee: 390 cals

Swim 30 minutes
Indoor cycling 70 minutes
Total calories burned: 800

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Sore knees, broken cleat, exercise bulimia

I woke up happy to work out, but some stuff hurts. Like my knees. And then in indoor cycling, one of my cleats broke, so I couldn't do any standing climbs and I had to be really careful about not flying out of the pedal. Then I wanted to run, but I couldn't - so I did 20 minutes of brisk walking, and I think tomorrow I will be able to run again.

Okay, on exercise bulimia: I read an article yesterday that said that bulimia can include people who don't actually throw up. Instead, they:

-- Exercise excessively
-- Punish themselves for overeating by exercising more
-- "Earn" foods by exercising

I totally do all of these things. Am I bad? Am I unhealthy?

I wish I didn't like food. It would make things so much easier.

Today's data:

Pre-workout: banana and milk in coffee, 110 cals
Breakfast: Fruit, cottage cheese, ham, cheese: 325 cals
Snack: Non-fat sugar-free vanilla latte: 100 cals
Lunch: Soup, Doritos, banana bread (don't ask, I'm evil): 500 calories
Dinner: Steak, bread, green beans
Dessert: Chocolate chip cookie
Total calories: lost count!!!

Swim 30 minutes
Bike 60 minutes
Walk 20 minutes (no running, my knees hurt)
Total calories burned: 825

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Sore day #2

I'm still sore from the weekend. I tried running, but it was not a good scene. So I walked briskly for an hour, and I will go back later today to do circuit training (and get a massage! Yum!).

Okay, I did that...but I also ate horrible food. Blah.

Today's data:

Pre-workout: Banana, 60 cals
Breakfast: Ham and cheese, milk in coffee, a scone (bad me): 545 calories
Snack: String cheese, 60 cals
Lunch: Salad and apple, 380 cals
Snack: Brownie, 300 cals
Dinner: Oh my goodness, pizza. Who knows, 1000 calories?
Total calories consumed: 2345

Walk 1 hour, 300 calories
Circuit training, 1 hour, 425 calories
Total calories burned: 725

Calorie surplus: 1600 (metabolic rate) + 725 (exercise) = 2325 exepnded; 2345 burned. So I guess I'm only over by 20 calories. Still, I could totally eat more and I can't let myself.

Monday, March 27, 2006


Walking = hard. Of course, I still want to do it. :-) I swam today, just half an hour, but I had to walk to two meetings so I got a little more exercise in too. Fun!

Today's food:
Pre-workout: 1/2 slice homemade banana bread, coffee with milk: 200 cals
Breakfast: Cottage cheese, fruit, ham, cheese, coffee with milk: 345 cals
Lunch: 1 slice pizza, small slice birthday cake: 550 cals
total so far: 1095 calories
Snack: Cheese and turkey, 120 cals
Dinner: Braised beef and mushrooms, rice: 375 cals
Bad me: Homemade banana bread: 200 cals
Total calories consumed: 1790

Swim 30 minutes
Walk 60 minutes
Total calories burned: 500

Friday, March 24, 2006

Backwards Duathlon!

Okay, first: um, yeah, meal tracking...what's that again? I always fall down on meal tracking on the weekend. I can say this much:

Friday I was slightly over on calories.
Saturday I was even or under on calories.
Sunday I was under on calories.

I do know how much exercise I did, though. And I want to talk about that, after I list it out.

Friday Exercise:
Swim 40 minutes
Indoor cycling 1 hour
Total calories burned: 750

Saturday Exercise:
Bike outside, 2 hours
Total calories burned: 1200 (because 2 hours was on-the-bike time, not stopping-and-still-having-an-elevated-heart-rate time)

Sunday Exercise:
Bike 45 minutes to Mercer Island
Run 1/2 marathon in 2:06
Bike 1 hour 15 minutes home (yeah, it was a longer route...and much more tired legs!)
Total calories burned: 2400

I felt great Friday and Saturday - Saturday I took on a hill that had haunted my dreams (Lakemont Blvd in Bellevue or Issaquah, I'm not sure which city claims that area) and the rest of my ride was fun - especially a couple miles in Issaquah alongside I-90, where the rollers just let you FLY - I didn't drop below 20 mph at all, and it really is rollers, not up and down. My pace was typically about 20-22 on the uphill parts, 26-28 on the downhills. Fun!!! But that's just for a few miles and wasn't indicative of the rest of the ride - we went at a comfortable pace and stopped to regroup a few times.

I was pretty nervous for Sunday, though. The plan was to bike to the half marathon, run the race for training only (goal time was 2:10 - 10 minute miles), then bike home. A backwards duathlon (since a du is usually run-bike-run, but we were bike-run-bike).

Danielle and I biked at a pretty brisk pace on the way to MI, but it's definitely more downhill than up to get there. We felt great, though, when we arrived. However, we got there too early: we had almost 90 minutes to wait before the race, and after we changed our clothes and locked up our bikes, we were cold. We ended up wandering around a nearby grocery store, reading food labels.

We executed perfectly on the race plan: we didn't start out too fast like I tend to do, we didn't change the plan partway in, and we ran the race in 2:06 despite a potty stop each (so I'm thinking we would have run the race in 2:02 or 2:03 if we didn't have to pee). The course is hilly, but not oppressively so - it's weird. I felt like I was going uphill almost all the time, which makes no sense. It seemed like we had a mile or so of uphill, followed by a brief downhill or flat part, then we went up some more. No hill except for the very last one just past mile 12 was steep though, so we were able to keep a strong, even pace throughout the race.

I started feeling great about mile 4, and that lasted until mile 9 or so. That's when my quads started feeling tired.

At mile 11, Danielle and I were discussing our fueling strategy with Stephanie, a dietician at the club. Both Danielle and Stephanie had already consumed two GUs - I had only had one. I asked Stephanie if she thought it would be worth it for me to have another, since we only had 2 miles to go - would it kick in in time? She said maybe - so I figured I'd try it. Well, it took less than 5 minutes for me to feel like I had a second wind. So that was awesome - then Stephanie told me that's a sign of excellent fitness. If your muscles can immediately start using the glucose you give them, that's very good. I was happy.

When we first got on our bikes after the race (after a stop at Subway for sandwiches), I could feel every single rotation of the pedals. My quads and glutes felt sore and tired - I couldn't feel any pain in my hamstrings. Danielle said it was her hamstrings where she was feeling it. We both suffered on the ride home, and while we didn't take the absolutely easiest way, we did granny-gear nearly all the hills (even though we wouldn't have needed to had we been fresh). However, it felt great to arrive home!

I made a mistake for the second time upon getting home, though: I didn't eat or drink right away. Instead, I made things worse by getting into a hot bath. Not smart - my head started pounding and I thought I was going to pass out. (Not the bath part, but the pass-out feeling part happened a couple of weeks ago when I did that 45-mile ride with Matthew.) So John got me water, and I just sat still in the tub and drank. Then I took a cool shower and felt better - then I ate a big lunch and felt a lot better.

I'm exhausted now. I took the kids swimming this afternoon so I could spend some quality time with them, since I did so much exercise this weekend. It certainly wasn't a heart-rate workout, but it was work! It was also nice, though, to feel weightless. I was debating between riding my hybrid bike slowly with the kids or swimming, and the sporadic rain made me choose the pool, which worked out nicely. But now it's 8:45 p.m. and I'm ready for bed!!!

So here I go, starting my recovery week. Yay! I think I've earned it. I'm only short 15 minutes on this crazy week, and that was abdominal exercises. I could do them now, but I won't - it's just not that important to me and I'd rather get in bed.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

25:17 - not bad!

It's Thursday, so it's 5K fun run day. Nancy and I ran 6 miles first on a very hilly route, I ate one GU (Espresso Love, 2x caffeine, yay!). Then I did my 5K in 25:17!

Here's how it's been for the last three weeks:

Mar. 9 - 26:34
Mar. 16 - 25:48
Mar. 23 - 25:17

So that's all goodness. I'm supposed to take next week off of the hard run, but I might do it anyway. This time I did it at 7.3 until the end: there's a 4% hill at the very end and I pushed things up to 7.4 then 7.5, then 8.0 at the end of the hill, then 8.5 then 9.0. Fun.

So here are today's data:

Pre-workout: Banana, 60 cals (no coffee, boo hoo)
Workout: 1 GU, 90 cals
Breakfast: Banana bread, ham, cheese, milk in coffee: 495 cals
Lunch: Shrimp and veggie stir-fry, 250 cals
Snacks: 2 pieces candy with peanut butter, turkey and cheese: 250 cals
total so far: 1145 calories
I'm not finishing today. Let's just say this: I had a healthy dinner. Then I ate everything in sight.

Run 1.5 hours
Lift weights (mostly upper body - no abs, I'll do that tomorrow since I missed it on Tuesday and did it yesterday instead) 30 minutes
Calories burned: 850

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

If it doesn't hurt, I didn't do it

Ow. Tight hamstrings.

Today's data:

Pre-workout: Banana and milk in coffee: 90 cals
Workout fuel: 1 GU, 100 cals
Breakfast: Ham, cheese, banana bread, milk in coffee: 545 cals
Lunch: Indian food (no rice): 500 cals
Bad bad bad: Candy, 100 cals
Snack: Turkey and cheese, pear: 180 cals
Total so far: 1515 cals (wow, I'm hungry today)
Dinner: Scallops, broccoli, peanut-butter pretzels: 550 cals
Dessert: Pear cake, 300 cals
Total consumed today: 2365 calories - ouch!!!

Swim 40 minutes
Indoor cycling 1 hour
Run 30 minutes
Abdominals (left over from yesterday): 15 minutes
Total calories burned: 1100

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Busy day, bad dinner

Oh I'm so bad - I was perfect all day so I celebrated with pizza. I even had healthy food to cook, but John and the kids wanted pizza so I went along. Bad bad bad. Now I have a tummyache, too - serves me right!

Today's data:

Pre-workout: Banana and coffee with milk, 90 cals
Workout fuel: 1 GU, 100 cals
Breakfast: Small piece banana bread, ham and cheese, coffee with milk, 345 cals
Lunch: Salad with turkey, 200 cals
Snack: Pear, bites of weird Japanese candy: 100 cals
Dinner: Pizza, cheese sticks and pretzels: 1000 cals
TOTAL: 1835 calories

Run 1 hour 1o minutes
Bike 1 hour (indoor cycling)
Lift weights 30 minutes
Total calories burned: 1100

Monday, March 20, 2006

Go go go go go!

Today I practically jumped out of bed at 4:30, ready to go! I guess a day of snowboarding really can count as a day of rest. I felt really good. I got a 40-minute swim in before indoor cycling at 6 a.m., although I didn't get to class early enough to get MY bike (okay, it's not really mine, but it's the one I prefer to use). Then I did a half-hour run, which was good as far as heart rate, muscular endurance, etc, but a little bit sucky because one side of my earphones will no longer output sound, so I only had one side to listen to and that was rather annoying.

The title of my post refers to what the indoor cycling instructor likes to say. I hear it in my head all the time. I worked really hard today in that class.

Here are today's data:

Pre-workout: Small banana, milk in coffee: 90 cals
Workout fuel: 1 GU, 100 cals
Breakfast: Yogurt with a little granola, ham and cheese, milk in coffee: 405 cals
Snack: 1 cookie, 150 cals
Lunch: Chicken noodle soup, crackers: 260 cals
Snacks: Clif "Nectar" bar (yummy), string cheese, strawberries: 260 cals
total so far: 1265 cals
Dinner: Chicken, green beans, peanut-butter pretzels: 650 cals
Because I'm very bad: Cadbury caramel egg, 190 cals
TOTAL: 2105 calories

Swim 40 minutes
Indoor cycling 1 hour
Run 30 minutes
Total calories burned: 1050

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Spring snowboarding!

Oh man it was so gorgeous today, totally clear, beautiful, warm. Yum. John and I were teaching a group of kids to snowboard (it was our auction gift for Gabriel's school) and it was actually really fun. The kids were well-behaved and learned quickly, the snow was perfect for learning, and it's so nice to be out in the sun! Of course, my cheeks are now mad (sunburn, yuck). But hey, it was great.

Today's data:
Breakfast: French toast, one egg, coffee with milk: 340 cals
Lunch: Veggies and dip, small yogurt, turkey bacon, grapes: 300 cals
Snack: Caramel frappuccino light, 140 cals; some of G's ice cream, 100 cals
Dinner: Peanut-butter pretzels, 280 cals; pizza, 600 cals
TOTAL: 1760 calories

Snowboarding all day - my HR monitor said 300 cals, reality is likely more though

Saturday, March 18, 2006

Metric century! (Almost...)

I had planned a 65-mile ride; it probably would have been more like 68-70, and 62.5 would have been a metric century. But it took so long - not because we rode slowly (though we did maintain a lower pace than I had expected to, but that was okay) but because we stopped and we got three flats between the two of us, so time was sucked up. Also, neither Danielle nor I carried enough food (I was SOOO dumb! I only carried one Luna bar!), so we had to stop a few times to get more food. Anyway, I had somewhere to be late in the afternoon, so about mile 60, John picked me up. I didn't get to finish my ride, which makes me feel like a loser...but oh well, life goes on, and I'll do it all next time.

Anyway, here are today's data:

Breakfast: Bagel with low-fat cream cheese, banana with peanut butter, egg, coffee with milk: 575 cals
On-the-road food:
1 granola bar - 170 cals
1 Luna bar - 180 cals
Small sandwich from Subway: 210 cals
Oatmeal raisin cookie: 200 cals
1 Samoa: 75 cals
Recovery food: Low-fat turkey sandwich and coffee, bites of Camille's cookie: 410 cals
Dinner: Bread, salad with beef: 450 cals
Dessert: M&Ms, Small Haagen-Dazs (these single-serving things, so cute!): 400 cals
TOTAL: 2670 calories

Ride 60 miles on my bike!
2200 calories burned

Friday, March 17, 2006

Oh man I'm sore

You can tell it's Friday by how I feel. :-) But I got up to 104 RPM while standing on the bike in indoor cycling today! (My quads will pay.)

Here are today's data:

Pre-workout: Banana and milk in coffee: 110 cals
Breakfast: Yogurt, milk in coffee, ham and cheese: 400 cals
Lunch: Chicken burrito, 700 cals
Total so far: 1210 cals
Snack: Peanut-butter pretzels, 200 cals
Dinner: Chicken wrap, fries: 700 cals
Dessert: Espresso brownie, 400 cals
Total consumed: 2510 calories

Indoor cycling, 75 minutes
Swim, 30 minutes
Calories burned: 750

Thursday, March 16, 2006

I beat myself!

Every Thursday I have a challenge scheduled for the non-recovery weeks in my Base 2 and Base 3 training. I have to do the 5K Fun Run profile on the treadmill faster than the week before - and ideally with a lower heart rate. Oh, and I have to do it after running for an hour prior, although last week I did it after swimming half an hour then running half an hour. The point is, I'm not fresh when I do this, and I push the boundaries of speed and heart rate.

Last week was my baseline: I ran it in 26:34, keeping the pace of 7.0 miles per hour until the last 1/3 km, where I pushed it up to 9. My max HR that I saw was 191.

This week I was 46 seconds faster, completing it in 25:48. I ran the first 2K at 7.1, then the rest at 7.2, then for the last 1/3 pushed it up to 9.0. My max HR was 190. So I beat myself quite nicely, although I'm nervous about the next few weeks. My best time ever was 24:40 for this program, so it would rock if I could get faster than that! But we'll see.

Today's data:

Pre-workout: Banana and milk in coffee: 110 cals
During workout: 1 GU, 100 cals
Breakfast: Mocha (nonfat, but with whip), ham and cheese, strawberries and cottage cheese: 500 cals
Lunch: Shrimp, couscous, veggies: 500 cals
Total so far: 1210 calories
Snack: 1 mini Reeses' peanut butter cup, cheese and turkey: 160 cals
Dinner: Shrimp (yeah again whatever), spinach, tortilla: 400 cals
TOTAL: 1770 calories
Um, dessert: Banana split from Dairy Queen, 510 cals
Real total: 2280 cals (still okay though)

Run 50 minutes outside
Run 1 mile (less than 10 min, then walking)
Run 5K fun run for time (max HR 190)
Swim 20 minutes
Calories burned: 950
Circuit training: 400 cals
Total calories burned: 1350!

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Glad it's over today

I enjoyed my workout, but I was really relieved to be done. I miss rest. It's only Wednesday - three more workout days before a day off. But even this Sunday, I'll be snowboarding all day. Hopefully it won't be too hard - I'm teaching three kids, so I don't guess I'll actually be working - but still. I'm tired.

Today's Data:

Pre-workout: Banana and coffee, 110 cals
Breakfast (a big one!): Ham and cheese (115), granola, strawberries, and cottage cheese (450 cals), coffee with cream (30): 595 cals
Lunch: Shrimp and veggie skewers, veggies, rice: 250 cals
Snack: Carrots and cheese dip: 100 cals
Candy: 2 pieces little candies: 120 cals
Dinner: Grapes, Fish, green beans, mashed potatoes: 360 calories
TOTAL so far: 1535 cals

Swim 40 minutes
Indoor cycling 1 hour
Run 30 minutes
Calories burned: 1050

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Back to work

Stuff hurts and I didn't want to swim, but I made myself. Maybe I'll write more later.

Pre-workout: Banana and coffee with milk: 110 cals
Breakfast: Banana bread, coffee with milk, ham and cheese: 435 cals
Lunch: Steak and beef barley soup: 435 cals
Snack: Turkey and cheese, one little candy: 160 cals
Total so far: 1140 calories
Dinner: Bread, pork chop, broccoli: 450 cals
Total: 1590 calories
Dessert: Strawberries with a little chocolate sauce over them (not bad!): 150 cals
TOTAL: 1740 calories - Yay!

Run 1 hour 10 minutes
Lift weights (upper body and abs only)
Swim 30 minutes
Calories burned: 800

Monday, March 13, 2006

I'm a crabby patty

I didn't feel like getting out of bed this morning, so I didn't go to the gym. And I didn't go to work either. Well, okay, that's not really fair, because I planned to stay home to take John to the doctor, but I'm not going in this afternoon either. I'm going to work from home. I am working from home. I actually can get a lot done this way, because the kids are at school and the house is clean and, frankly, I have interesting work to do.

But I should also blog. I didn't yesterday, but my eating wasn't too bad anyway. I rode my bike 30 miles aiming for keeping the speed above 20 mph - I did manage to do it most of the time, but sometimes I had to draft off my friend to get a little break. Then I felt guilty for drafting.

But today is today, and despite my crabbiness, here are the data:

Breakfast: Ham, hard-boiled egg, Kashi Go-Lean Crunch cereal with 1% milk, coffee with whole milk: 400 cals
Lunch: Chicken with artichoke hearts and mushrooms (my creation!), chicken noodle soup: 340 cals
During exercise: 1/2 Luna bar, 90 cals
Post exercise snack: 1/2 Luna bar, fruit cup: 160 cals
Total so far: 990 cals
Dinner: Bread, cheese, salad with low-fat dressing, asparagus, steak: 600 cals
Dessert: 1/2 Woopie pie: 200 cals
TOTAL: 1790 calories

Bike 1.5 hours, 24 miles
Run 1 hour (6 miles? I hope at least, though my legs felt like lead)
Calories burned: 1300

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Breakfast of Champions

Ah, the banana chocolate chip muffin from Starbucks. Golden brown on top with rich chocolate chips and chunks of real banana. 470 calories of deliciousness...the perfect way to precede a bike ride. Too bad I'm too full to feel like riding now!

Well, it worked out okay - I had enough energy for my ride. We took it easy for most of the way, then I pushed hard and maintained 20+ mph over a couple of rolling miles (slight uphills, slight downhill). That part felt amazing - I've got to remember what being in that zone feels like and figure out how to get there, and stay there.

Today's data:

Breakfast: Banana chocolate chip muffin, coffee with milk: 500 calories
Lunch: Salmon and trail mix, coffee with milk: 490 cals

Bike 1.5 hours, 865 calories burned

Friday, March 10, 2006

No banana bread this week!

This is a good thing, even though today I wanted it. The cafeteria no longer has it daily, and today wasn't the day. Oh well! It's better for me. Although I did eat yummy Costco granola.

I'm in an excellent mood after a great workout: a 30 minute swim followed by indoor cycling for 1.5 hours followed by a half-hour run. Danielle taught today, and had a cancellation at 7:30 a.m. so she let people stay up until 8 a.m. I wanted to stay the entire hour, but I was talking to the woman next to me and invited her to bike tomorrow, so I only did half an hour to save enough time for a good ride tomorrow.

Today's data:

Pre-workout: yogurt and coffee with milk: 140 cals
Breakfast: Coffee with milk, yogurt and granola, ham and cheese: 595 cals
Lunch: Salad and chicken breast, 400 calories
Snack: Trail mix, carrots and cheese, apple: 305 cals
Dinner: Pork tenderloin, spinach, orzo: 400 calories
Dessert: 2 Brownie bites and milk: 280 cals
TOTAL: 2120 calories

Swim 30 minutes
Bike 90 minutes
Run 30 minutes
Total calories burned: 1300

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Major workout day

It felt great to work out hard this morning...and I'm going back at noon.

Okay, I didn't go back at noon. I was halfway to my car when I realized I was insane. I worked out HARD this morning; why do I need to lift weights today, when I only do it twice a week anyway? I can do it tomorrow or even tonight if I feel better. Right now I have sore quads and a sore shoulder.

Today's data:

Pre-workout: Banana and coffee with cream: 110 cals
Workout fuel: 1 GU, 1/2 Luna bar: 190 cals
Breakfast: Ham and cheese, cottage cheese and strawberries, coffee with cream: 295 cals
Total so far: 595 cals
Snack: Carrots and cheese dip, yogurt: 195 cals
New total: 790
Lunch: Sashimi and miso soup, 250 cals
Snack: Peanut butter with M&Ms, 100 cals
New new total: 1140 cals
Dinner: Chicken breast, spinach, trail mix (because I'm bad), two brownie bites: 650 cals
TOTAL: 1790 cals

Swim 30 minutes
Run 1 hour - including 5K fun run
Baseline: 26:34 - ran @ 7.0, at end pushed up to 9.0
Indoor cycling 1 hour
Total calories burned: 1350

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Jessica = Overly dramatic

It's not fair to say this was the worst morning ever. Although I was thinking, how many wives out there see their husband almost-die on a regular basis? Enough to be calm about it and be able to joke with the 911 operator?

Maybe I'm the psychotic one. Detachment or whatever. And maybe I should stop writing about this now because this is a blog about diet and exercise, not my family issues. I think it's just that it feels good to write and/or talk about it, so I can't help it. But I'm going to go to sleep now. I've got a huge exercise day tomorrow!
Worst. Morning. Ever.

At least I'm not talking about diet or exercise. Well, actually, I guess it would be better if I were.

I woke up at 3:40 a.m. completely and totally alert. Immediately I knew something was wrong: I've got a sixth sense about when John is about to have a seizure. To anyone else, he probably just looked asleep - he wasn't even sweaty or warm - but there was something about him that made me just know. I don't know what it is.

I tried to wake him up. I got a soda from the kitchen and asked him to drink it, but I couldn't get him to respond. So I got out a shot of glucagon - a hormone that causes the liver to release sugar - and gave it to him. He was semi-conscious at this point, but he let me give him the shot. Then he stood up and nearly fell over. I asked him, then yelled at him to sit down on the floor. I knew that if he were going to have a seizure, better it be from the floor than falling to the floor, or on the bed where he would likely fall off anyway.

So he sat down on the floor, then started having a seizure. His seizures are just like an epileptic grand mal seizure, and if you've never seen one, I do think it looks like the Simpsons' episode where they're watching Japanese animation that causes seizures. His whole body stiffens and convulses; he sounds like he's choking; it's very rhythmic and scary. It lasts probably 30 seconds to a minute, but it feels like forever. I called 911 as soon as it was over; during the seizure I was trying to move John's feet, because they were underneath our dresser and I thought they would probably hurt from banging against the wood. However, by putting him on the floor I did avoid the usual head injury he gets from hitting the bedside table as he falls out of bed.

When the seizure is over, his breathing is really weird. It's like Fred Flintstone snoring - really loud and through the lips, not the nose. It sounds like his lips are flapping - but weirdly, his mouth is actually closed. And his chest doesn't rise and fall - instead, his belly does. I've had 911 operators tell me to start CPR when they hear that ineffective breathing - I never do, since he most definitely has a pulse (it's racing), but I do worry every time about whether oxygen is actually getting to his brain.

The fire department folks are the first to arrive; the EMTs don't come until probably 10-15 minutes later. They know us by now, which is really sad. Gabriel woke up right after they arrived, and by then, John had begun screaming. The screams are pretty much as loud as you can imagine - and as fearful. It sounds like he's being murdered, like he's begging for his life, and who knows - maybe he is. But from himself, of course. Gabriel completely flipped out and started crying - I let him into our room, because there wasn't a single place in the house (or probably the neighborhood) where he couldn't hear John's screams, so at least he could see that John was being cared for.

When John began speaking again, it was one word: "Please" in a terrified voice, alternating with those crazy screams. He looks through people, not at them - there is no recognition in his eyes that he's even seen you before. The EMTs tested his blood sugar - it was 120, then rose to the 200s - and couldn't understand why he wasn't out of it. They started an IV with a dextrose solution and got his blood sugar up to the 500s. John didn't stop yelling and saying "please." One of them guessed that the seizure triggered some sort of psychiatric thing deep in his brain - a "fight or flight" mechanism - and suggested Haldol to medicate him. As EMTs don't carry Haldol, they settled for Valium.

He calmed down a little with the valium, but he was still fighting and it still took the five of the EMTs to hold him down. I asked one of them why he was still fighting, and she said she didn't know - the amount of valium they'd given him could kill another person. Eventually he calmed down enough so they could bring in the backboard and strap him on for the ride to the emergency room.

I called my next-door-neighbor to come get the kids. It was 4:45 a.m. It's great to have excellent friends nearby. Apparently she had no trouble getting the kids to go back to sleep in their spare bedroom. Thank goodness for that.

The EMTs strapped John to the backboard - by the way, he's completely naked, covered (barely) by a bathrobe - and haul him into the aid car. I follow it to the hospital.

John is awake and knows who I am by the time I arrive at the hospital, but feeling horrible - headache, muscle aches, stomachache, etc. He forces himself to vomit - what did he eat last night? Whatever it was, it looked nasty - and after a few hours, they discharge him. In the hospital is the worst time for me, not that I matter here. Once I know he's going to be okay, I just want to get him home - I sit on a hard metal folding chair in a freezing cold room while John naps, and I end up wishing I were the sick one, or at least that he were admitted so I'd have an armchair to sleep in. But the doctor on duty was one who recognized John from previous visits, so he knew I could handle things as soon as John seemed okay. They gave him a shot for the nausea and sent us home.

So, that's all I feel like saying. No exercise, no meal tracking today. All I want is a nap.

I did look at my schedule and I think I've arranged things so that I can make up the lost time from today...of course, I should probably chalk this day up to extenuating circumstances and just forget about the workout hours, but that's not really in my nature to do...

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Yesterday = Not Good. Today = The Real New Start

Okay, so I tried and failed. Microsoft has this tradition that on your anniversary (or at least milestone ones) you bring in one pound of M&Ms for each year you've worked here. Yesterday was my five-year anniversary. Ugh. There were still M&Ms outside my office this morning, and I ate some yesterday every time I walked into or out of my office. Bad bad bad.

So last night I went to the grocery store and spent $40 on healthy foods to stock my in-office fridge. I now have carrots, celery, low-fat cheese sticks, peanut butter, apples, oranges, some kind of low-fat, low-cal dip for the carrots and celery, and turkey breast slices. And other stuff I think. So today I'm going to try to be very very good.

I have to report this: I am exhausted. Both yesterday and today in afternoon meetings, I was close to nodding off. I feel like I could close the blinds to my office and curl up on my futon and go to sleep right now. Tonight I have a massage scheduled - that might be weird. What if I actually do fall asleep? (Does it matter? Wouldn't my muscles receive the same benefit either way?)

Today I was much more successful at sticking to the food plan...not 100%, but at least calorie-wise I'm okay. My calories are too high in the evenings. I need to work on that.

Anyway, here are today's data.

Pre-workout: Banana (no cream in my coffee...yuck!) 80 cals
Breakfast: Ham and cheese, cottage cheese and strawberries, coffee with lots of cream to make up for the morning: 325 cals
Lunch: Turkey, string cheese, carrots, spreadable cheese, turkey chili: 505 cals
Snack: Yogurt and orange, 170 cals
Dinner: Beef stir-fry, yogurt and granola, a little bit of trail mix: 800 cals
TOTAL TODAY: 1880 calories - not bad given my exercise level!

Run 1 hour (and six minutes)
Lift weights 45 minutes
Swim 30 minutes
Calories burned: 950

Monday, March 06, 2006

New period, new week, new start

Okay, after this weekend's excess, I'm newly committed to eating right. I hope.

I'm starting the first week of Base 2 training. This morning I had my lightest day this week: just a half-hour swim and indoor cycling. It was fun, but I'm a bit sore from the weekend - and one of my knees kind of hurts. I'm hoping it's due to the snowboarding yesterday. I really shouldn't snowboard while I'm training. Maybe next year I won't train for anything and I'll just try to have fun. But that doesn't really fit with my personality.

Here are today's data:

Pre-workout: Banana and coffee with cream, 110 cals
Breakfast: Ham and cheese, yogurt and granola (not the super calorie Costco kind though), coffee with cream: 400 cals
Snack: Pumpkin bread, 150 cals
Lunch: Chicken in salad, 400 cals
Snack: M&Ms and a Samoa, 225 cals
Dinner: Beef stir-fry, 300 cals
Grazing on things I shouldn't: 200 cals
Thin mint girl scout cookies (these should be part of the above "things I shouldn't graze on" category): 210 cals
Total: 1995 calories

Swim 30 minutes
Indoor cycling 1 hour
700 calories burned

Oh, I'm deliberately not weighing myself for a while. I know I'm in a bad place. I'm going to try to work hard to get back to a better one and then weigh myself and be happy.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Don't Ask About the Rest of Friday, or Saturday, or Sunday...

Suffice to say the banana bread kicked off a rollercoaster of sugar highs followed by crashes that were fixed by more sugar and caffeine...the only saving graces (although I don't think it fully accounts for the damage I did) were the 3 hour, 1800 calorie burn bike ride I did Saturday morning, and the four hours I spent snowboarding today.

Tomorrow's goal is to be very, very good. Wish me luck.

Friday, March 03, 2006

#1 Rule of Weight Loss: Don't Bake

Mmm...homemade banana bread. Yummy. And Gabriel insisted that we add chocolate to it, so it's all the more yummy.

Okay, back to exercise: I swam this morning, then did indoor cycling low-key (zone 2 mostly), then ran 20 minutes at a very low zone 3.

And I want to eat the whole darn loaf of banana bread - all 1700 calories of it. Which makes each slice 170, which makes the two I ate this morning 340. Ha ha.

I also re-did my training plan to accommodate more hours. Yay. It was easy. There are a few days that will be hard, but mostly I just made realistic numbers for how long I'm actually going to be biking on Saturdays and it worked out well.

Here's the rest of today's damage:

Pre-workout: Coffee with cream, banana: 110 cals
Breakfast: Coffee with cream, ham and cheese, my banana bread: 475 cals

Swim 30 minutes
Indoor cycling 1 hour
Run 20 minutes
Total calories burned: 750

Thursday, March 02, 2006

I get to do more!

Danielle ran my training plan by another trainer at the Pro Club, one who is triathlon-certified. He said that despite Joe Friel's book that I used to develop my plan, which says I can train a minimum of 500 hours a year and do a half-iron, I should be doing more. And this is a good thing, because now that I've been through a 14.5 hour week last week (I know, scheduled for 13.5, but I went over), I know I can do it.

So he said I should have 10 hours a week on my recovery weeks; I'm going to work from there to determine what the rest of the weeks should be and re-build my plan. I'm excited!

Today I had a stomachache this morning, so I walked for 20 minutes before running for 40 - in zone 2 again, HR around 135 (lower than yesterday). Then I did 75 minutes of yoga - no calorie burn but lots of stretching. I feel really good now, too.

Oh, and I'm wearing the smallest pair of pants I own. They're the same size (6) as every other pair I have, but I always feel fat in them, and today I feel okay. I haven't weighed myself all week - going a little less obsessive for a while. I'm sure I'll shift back though, I always do.

So, here are today's data:

Pre-workout: Banana. No coffee really - it was too hot to drink the whole way to the club! - 90 cals
Breakfast: Banana bread (my weekly treat, but it wasn't that good today), ham and cheese, coffee with cream: 535 cals
Lunch: 8 oz chili, 250 cals; chicken breast, 200 cals; cucumber slices, 25 cals - total 475 cals
Total so far today: 1010 calories
Snack: 1/2 Luna bar, 90 cals
Dinner: Shrimp and green beans, 400 cals
Dessert: Banana bread (homemade!) 400 cals
total: 1900 calories

Walk 20 minutes, run 40: 325 calories burned
Yoga, 75 minutes: No additional calories (per the monitor at least), but good for me :-)
Circuit training (weight lifting and, for me, light cardio): 300 calories

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Slow and Steady Wins the Pace

Today I had scheduled a zone 2 run - my goal was to run it with a heart rate completely below 140. Well, I did - but it was really hard! I kept having to force myself (mentally) not to speed up and run like I know I could. But frankly, I'm sore from circuit training yesterday (mostly my glutes and hamstrings), and that's not the point of a recovery week. So it's better that I ran 12-minute miles than had I sped up to do 8 or 9. That will be for next week!

Today's data:

Pre-workout: Coffee and banana, 110 cals
Breakfast: Ham and cheese, 1 cup fruit, coffee with cream: 255 cals
Lunch: Chicken taco salad (only a few bites of the shell): 510 cals
Snack: Chicken breast (um, thermogenesis?): 260 cals
Total so far: 1135 cals
Dinner: Chicken breast, broccoli, bread: 500 cals
Dessert: Yogurt with granola: 300 cals
TOTAL: 1935 calories - a little high

Run 60 minutes at 5 mph!, HR average 138 (solid zone 2), 400 calories burned